LIFE. haha.
there is a singular joy in being near one who feels loved, completely and fully, with nothing more to ask. ...that is how i felt last night, watching my grandmother as she drifted off to sleep, coming awake now and then to ask funny, sporadic questions, but finally, sleeping, a smile playing on her lips, and forehead smooth and free from anxiety at last. it was from the deep knowledge and assurance that she was loved by her children and grandchildren, and how rich and lucky she felt because of that. but more than that, like a child, she took with complete and unfailing trust our love and that we would be there when she woke up. ....she was giving herself up to us, asking her to take care of her, with perfect confidence that we wouldn't let her down.
it sounds trite and oversentimental, because i cannot do it justice, but i think it was one of the best moments of my life. sitting there by her side, just taking it in. it was pure feeling. i think i caught a bit of that swelling a parent must feel in his heart when he looks at his child, as he is going to sleep. how big it makes you feel- and how small, at the same time. and perhaps of what God desires us so much to do, in relation to him.
for perfect love casts out fear.
